Self-care is something that most of us do not spend enough time doing. Our health depends on our mental state, which makes self-care techniques so important. Lucy Forsting returns, and alongside Bob Gilpatrick and Rollie Culp, talks about self-care. They share some great resources, techniques and nutrition that can help you create your own self-care routine. They also talk about the amazing benefits for your physical and mental health that a little bit of self-love can bring. So sit back relax and get ready to live forever young!
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Self Love, Self Care With Lucy Forsting
Love yourself, your life depends on it!
On the show is Lucy Forsting, host of Synergy Connection Radio, is back for a visit to teach us about self-love and self-care. Self-care or self-love is something that most of us do not spend enough time doing. On the show, we share some great resources, techniques, and nutrition that can help you create your own self-care routine. We also talk about the amazing benefits for your physical and mental health that a little bit of self-love can bring, so sit back, relax, and get ready to live forever young.
I am here with Lucy Forsting for the third time and Rollie is here with us also. We are going to be talking about the topic of self-love and self-care. Welcome, Lucy and Rollie. How are both of you doing? Good. How is everybody doing? I’m great.
It is good to have you back. We had a segment on exercise with Dave Spinelli and he was telling us about this book called Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends on It. The author was Kamal Ravikant. Kamal wrote this book because of the troubles he was having in his own life. He literally meant it like your life depends on it because he was very depressed. He wrote this book and told the world what he did about it and how he came to love himself. It created quite a stir and gave energy to the whole concept of self-love. There has been lots of talk about it, podcasts, book reviews, and all that type of thing. That is why we are going to talk about his book but then also the whole concept of self-care.
It is incredibly important to do that. A lot of the people that I work with as a therapist is exactly where we are because for the last years, everybody has been stressed to the max, and they do not know how to get back to that place that is peaceful that is not filled with anxiety and dread.
He has a blog you can go and read to where he gives updates called Kamal.blog. It is very creative. When we look at Kamal’s book, what he was saying is he started repeating the phrase “I love myself” to himself. He had this deep sense of how important it was. He would sit sometimes for hours and repeat that to himself. It created this loop in his brain that became this cognitive commitment later on. That related to a show you did with us before, which is Finding A New Perspective and creating your own reality with your thoughts because your thoughts are the things that drive you to where your goals are going to go. If you have bad thoughts or you have something anything that is not positive towards yourself, it is going to have a negative effect.
In fact, I was at Marjorie Rawlings State Park signing my book. It was funny because I was on this porch and there were two other authors and myself. Each of us had a chance to read a little excerpt from our book. The book is about animals that talk. I had told a little bit about myself and was getting ready to talk about a part of the story and in came this flock of chickens. They are free-range chickens. They started walking right in front of me and one-hopped up beside me. I went, “I could not have planned this any better.” It was funny.
What is the book you are talking about? The Adventures of Miss Twiggs & Company. It explains the importance of if we do not monitor our thoughts, if we are moving down that road of anxiety and dread, that is what we get. Chickens do not know that.
Read that book, The Adventures of Miss Twiggs & Company. Kamal was talking about, “If you get to the point where you love yourself, then the universe will give you love, so you will attract love from the outside to yourself.”
Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends on It
It is like the doors and the windows open up instead of staying closed.
We were talking about that on the Power of Visualization & The Law Of Attraction. You’ve got to put that vibe out to get it back. Whatever you put out is what you are going to be bringing back in.
If people are having a hard time loving themselves, it sets up an opposite belief that somehow they are not okay. We also know from the studies from the HeartMath Institute on inner balance that the concept of things-are-not-okay, including I-am-not-okay, is what sets up this loop that creates stress that then throws off your hormones. Part of that loop of things-are-not-okay into things-are-okay is first I’m okay. Not only am I okay but I’m okay enough that I can love myself.
Here is something that I’m going to bring out because you and I are both golfers. How many times have you stood on the tee, swung, and it was not the best shot you have ever hit? The mental message that we give ourselves at that moment is, “It is going to be one of those days.” I used to win more golf tournaments that I was in because my opponent did that. They literally made that statement and I thought, “The game has won. I have already got it.” It was always true. The “I’m okay. I deserve to win” whether it is golf, tennis, a swim match or life is where it comes from. It has to be there so that we understand the principle of what we are giving up, we are receiving in return.
We were talking earlier with Rollie about how to demonstrate self-love with real-life things like stuff that you would consider self-care that you can do. If you do it with the intention and the focus that says, “I’m doing this for myself because I love myself,” then the self-care task takes on a different power. Can you tell us some of those things that, from your perspective, self-care things that people can do that also demonstrate that they love themselves?
Certainly with Boomer products, starting with nutrition in general because we know that our food grown nowadays is depleted by the time it gets to the store. Looking at using nutritional supplements, I have used their products for many years and attribute my not getting COVID at all to that. My immune system is strong. My inflammation level is low. You talk about that all the time and that is part of it. Nutrition, stress reduction, if you are stressed, get out in nature and get a pet. Pets love us unconditionally. We can hold a cat in our lap or a dog, depending on the size.
We can do things that will allow us to de-stress. Getting sufficient sleep is incredibly important. You have the Good Night Formula and people that are having trouble with sleep because they have got monkey brains going on. They lay and the lights are out but they have got 21 things that they were trying to figure out how to do or how not to do depending on the situation, learning to say no to people.
There is not one of us probably that does not want to be a pleaser. Our nature is that we want to help others. You would not be doing what you are doing. I would not be a therapist. I would not have written a book if I did not want to help people. We have a tendency. As a result, to say yes far more often to everyone else than to ourselves. We go to the bottom of the list, and then we can become resentful and angry because we are not taking care of ourselves.
I spent a few years studying Bioenergetic Therapy. One of the things that were part of the instruction was how to say no. The instructor, John, made it easy. He would demonstrate and go, “If someone is saying, ‘We are going out tonight. Meet us at the bar at 10:00.’ You know that you are not feeling that well. You have got an important task you are going to do with your daughter in the morning. You have to take her somewhere. You want to say no but you also end up saying yes instead because you are a pleaser.”
Simply shake your head first, whether you are in the presence of the person or on the phone, and very politely go, “No, I don’t think so. That does not feel right to me because I need to do this or that.” Now, you are going to get pushback, “Everybody is going out. Do not be like that.” Simply repeat, “No, I appreciate you inviting me but that does not feel right to me because I have to do this. It does not mean I do not love you, guys, but thank you anyway. No, and I’ve got to go now. See you later.’” Now I know how to do it.
That is my problem. I cannot say no. People make suggestions all the time, “Let’s do this and that. Can you do that for me?” They are not expecting you to say yes every time unless you are a yes person and you have given them evidence that you always say yes but maybe it is not the right thing to do. There is your no.
That is a simple technique because sometimes it is very difficult to be able to say no because you like the person and want to help them, so go ahead and say yes.
The idea of shaking my head, you get your body physically into it. That way your mind will follow. You can also do tapping on that issue and also the issue of self-love. If you tap on your fingertips and you say about, there is no thing, even though up until now, I thought it was really hard to say no, I completely love and accept myself anyway.
I’m grateful now that I realized I can simply shake my head side-to-side and politely say, “No, that does not feel right to me,” and be completely peaceful about the whole thing.” Cross your hands on your heart, breathe in, let it out and you are associating peacefulness with that gesture with the new you that’s able to say no.
Similarly, on the whole topic of self-love and if you are looking in the mirror saying, “I love myself,” but there’s this shroud of doubt as to whether or not you are lovable, tap on that, “Even though up until now, I thought it was difficult to believe that I was lovable, I completely love and accept myself anyway. I’m grateful now that I realize I am lovable because the whole kingdom of heaven is within me. I have that kingdom inside of me.
That is the self that I love and I’m feeling that completely something.” You have used the power of your Meridian system, which goes right up into your brain to discharge the belief that you are not lovable or you can’t say no. Instead, you replaced it with a new belief and anchored it to peacefulness, which is one of the benefits of self-love. Can you tell us about some of the benefits of practicing these different aspects you were talking about like learning to say no, getting enough sleep, and all those things?
The Adventures of Miss Twiggs & Company
As an interjection here, I have a 21-day video that I send to my therapy clients that is all about the attitude of gratitude. They start that in the morning, usually 10 to 15 minutes before they get out of bed. They set their alarm so they can do that. When you start your day with these feelings of peacefulness and gratitude, then certainly you are going to enter the day with a lot more energy. There is going to be less anticipation of what is going to go wrong now because a lot of people, that is where they are.
They lay their feet on the floor, got this list, and wondering, “How much can I accomplish? What is going to go wrong? Who is going to say what?” The gratitude and peacefulness take you into your day where you have more energy. Your relationships are going to be better because you are not going with that projection of problems. You are going with a projection of, “I love life. I love me. I love my situation. I’m okay.” All of that certainly allows for you to accomplish more in the day, and then feel good at the end of the day.
When you think about the actual physical thing that it could do for you, it probably helps if you are getting burnt out or you have issues with getting overwhelmed or anxious. That is obviously going to be a benefit.
How many people in the last years have had adrenal fatigue? They are dragging themselves out of bed and from place to place. By putting some of these systems into place, then there is a golden opportunity for them to be more successful in every aspect of their life.
Even with some physical aspects like reduction in blood pressure and if people are able to get better sleep, we know that there is research that shows that you can lose weight while you are sleeping because your metabolism changes if you have had enough rest. All the other things that are related to stress and inflammation are also going to improve because if you can stop that voice in your head that says, “Things are not okay.”
Instead, go about your day with your primary beliefs, “Being that things are okay, including me,” and take it a step further, “I love my life and myself,” now you have stopped that loop in your head that leads to the hormonal secretions that cause the inflammation.
Elevated cortisol starts with the thought that things are not okay. If you can break that, then you can change your hormonal levels, so you are not creating inflammation in your body, which leads to heart disease, strokes, cancer, diabetes, Alzheimer’s disease, etc. Everything is the root of all chronic disease inflammation.
Inflammation does start with stress. If we have perpetual stress, things are going to begin to unravel. No matter what the source is.
It is taking a personal checkup from the neck up. What is going on upstairs is what is going to be happening in your life. Do you have your own website or is it the podcast website?
The podcast website is out there. What’s the name of it? The podcast itself? Synergy Connection. Is that SynergyConnection.com? You can find it that way or you can find it if you look up www.SynergyConnectionRadio.com.They will also be linked in that way.
Self Care: By putting some of these self-love systems into place, there's a golden opportunity for them to be more successful in every aspect of their life.
Do you have a different website? It is amazing to me but if people just type in my name, Lucy Forsting, I come up in so many links like a podcast with other guests, book, show, and counseling. It is absolutely crazy. It is all out there, so they can get ahold of me.
Is there a web form they can fill out to reach you? If somebody wanted personal attention from you, counseling, advice, and more information, they could connect with you, reach you, and have you as their personal coach.
They can even go to Facebook and leave me a message that way on messenger. That is another avenue to reach out. With LinkedIn, I’m on there and align able. There are a number of ways that they can reach out and find me.
There are more also to all these aspects of self-care but it’s too much for now. What we are going to do is because the show has a website that when you click on a particular show like this one, The Self-Love Self-Care, they will be able to read what we talked about. Lucy, thank you so much for joining us. This has been a pleasure to have you with us. Thank you, everybody, for reading. We will see you at the next show.
- Synergy Connection Radio
- Dave Spinelli - Past Episode
- Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends on It
- Finding A New Perspective – Past Episode
- The Adventures of Miss Twiggs & Company
- Power of Visualization & The Law Of Attraction – Past Episode
- Good Night Formula
- Facebook – Lucy Forsting
- LinkedIn – Lucy Forsting
About Lucy Forsting
As a child growing up in rural Indiana, I became aware of loss and unfilled dreams watching our pets die and various family members live frustrating and anxious lives. I knew I couldn’t “fix” these issues as a child but I found myself trying to soothe adults and peers by focusing on what “could be” rather than what was. After undergraduate and graduate school, I worked with both corporate America and higher educational institutions where I began to understand how a person’s thought process could potentially sabotage their entire life.
I was also able to educate funeral directors across America helping them see the process of grief goes on long after the burial of a loved one. Establishing a full service mental health clinic with two satellite offices in NE Wisconsin provided additional evidence of the patterns of “faulty” thinking where a person could go down the proverbial rabbit hole of despair and loneliness. All that was necessary in many cases was to show the person a better way to navigate their life.
Additional training as a Reiki Master allowed me to combine energy work with my therapeutic training to help people see the true complexity of who we are as human beings. Once the foundation of our life is in place, we begin to build the “energetic doors, windows, walls and electrical systems."
The design which then emerges has the potential of becoming the amazing and fulfilling destination every person deserves to live. Connecting the dots between the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual components of our life is critical in order to actually “live your best life” which is the focus of the “Synergy Connection” show.
It is my hope and belief that through this show, people of all ages, ethnic backgrounds, religious beliefs, educational levels and genders can find a way to live happier and more fulfilling lives. Finally, in order to benefit schools and readers of all ages, I have written a children’s book called “The Adventures of Miss Twiggs and Company”. The book helps the reader understand how we truly create our own personal reality. More information on this book can be found at www.misstwiggs.com or on Amazon Books in the children’s or inspirational divisions.